I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
