She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
