She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
