And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize
