He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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