When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
