I'm really into asian looking animals
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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