He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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