I hate your face
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
did i just pee glitter
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
