The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
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