sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Randomize
