Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
