i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
