Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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