Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
