And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
