Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Randomize
