I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Terrible idea I love it
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize
