After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
