Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
