PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
