normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
True college students do jello shots in the library
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
