mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
