We named our party play list daddy issues
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
