There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Randomize