I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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