I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
