In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
There are leaves in my underwear?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
