it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Randomize
