that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
pop tarts are not kleenex
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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