I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Randomize
