I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Randomize
