Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
