i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
