This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
