so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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