We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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