I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
