And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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