hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Can i not drive my cunt home
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
