Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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