you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
