ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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