oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
We don't watch enough power rangers
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
