She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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