I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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