If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
