he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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