dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
