She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
