hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
